Nightmare in the Dentist’s Chair

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Turn seventy-two // what can I do
With a fortune in crowns and fillings
Looks like my investments have fallen
Gone into a recession I’m feeling.
Two of them must come out of there;
The last of my wisdom and my silver too
All hit a new low this week
As I sat in the oral surgeon’s chair.
The oral surgeon welcomed me in;
Gave me his best reclining chair
Told me to climb in.
He sat down beside me // put his hand on my arm
Told me the details // said no need for alarm;
“I will numb you up and it will hurt a little
Until the Novocain kicks in;
Then it will be mostly pressure
As I twist and pull //spin and piddle”
He said he could give me gas if I wanted
But I opted only for the shots
Not knowing what was coming
I figured that would hit the spot.
It didn’t take long to soon became aware;
As the needle hit the lower jaw…
The usual pinch and sting were there;
But when he shot the upper jaw
My brain did a double take // sent up a flare.
Heat spread all the way up my nose
Clear to the back of my head;
I said “Woah, what was that!”
As he stuck a couple more in my head
He patted my arm said, “You did well!”
“It will be numb in no time;”
That I could tell.
In a few minutes he was back
With cap and gown and mask
Stuck a block in my jaw
And started on his task
He twisted and pulled // even sliced and cut
But the tooth would not come out
It was then he paused // and got his Dremel Saw out!
Sitting there helpless what could I do?
As he proceeded to cut my tooth in two!
It seemed OK till he got to the nerve;
It was then the second jolt kicked in;
“Oh, what was that,” but he kept on cutting.
Then grabbed that tooth one more time
And jerked each half out //leaving me sputtering.
With needle and thread, he sewed me up
Then started on the one on top
I thought, oh no, but it was too late
…And did it all over again

Dentist Clip Art:

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