Black Holes

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This is an abridged version of my poem, Black Holes in the Brain, showing the effects of Alzhiemer’s disease on a person. During the stressful transition from independent living to confined living the confusion for my father-in-law was greatly increased. I posted his Wandering/Wonderings earlier this week.

Bjorn from d’Verse~Poets Pub asked us to consider the use of punctuation in poetry. It helps shoe line breaks and increases flow for the reader. This one is full of punctuation. It was written four years ago after working through this difficult transition.

Black Holes In My Brain

“I have come to discover that I now have black holes in my brain.
Spaces of emptiness that never get filled.
Like the holes in my pants pocket the memories slip out…”

“Oh, you are here? Well I didn’t realize! When did you get here?
You have been here a few weeks? Well I didn’t remember.
Tell me something I should know…
What shall we talk about…”

“Can I do something for you… do you need a light on?
Would you like to watch the News if I turn it on?
Do you want me to set the table for breakfast?
Can I help you in some way?
Would you like a piece of chocolate? Go ahead have one!”

“Is this Sunday? Are we going to church today?
Where is Mother & when is she coming home?
She won’t be coming back home? Oh my!
These are things I should remember.
When will we go to see here again? Can we go today?
We were there today?
Why can’t I remember? Were we just there today?!”

“I remember my grandfather was just like this.
He would apologize for his memory all the time.
I hope I never get that way.”

“By the way, where is Mother?

********************************************

Photo: Dwight L. Roth

Join us at d’verse :  https://dversepoets.com

Note: This evening, after this had posted, we got word that he had died.

 

60 thoughts on “Black Holes

  1. My grandfather was like this too, asking and repeating himself all the time. I can imagine this with all the questions. Hopefully if we are keep being active, we can avoid having the same fate.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Very black holes. I think we all fear it. I always wondered how things looked from inside my mother’s eyes and mind…it didn’t seem to be the same person, but if now, where was she? A mystery. (K)

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Such a deeply felt poem Dwight and how could it not be. To see a loved ones suffer this way must be so very heard. I haven’t had someone close to me go through this but have seen and visited with near friends.

    The worst is you don’t know how much the afflicted person knows.

    Bless you and yours

    Miriam

    Liked by 2 people

  4. This is one of our biggest fears, that ‘black hole’ that many of us are going to fall into. My husband’s aunt is falling. From simple forgetfulness a few years ago she’s now at the stage of lying in bed all day staring at the ceiling.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I’m so sorry for your loss, Dwight. I know this was difficult to live through. I think it must be awful to be aware that something is wrong, but not quite knowing. The black hole/hole in the pants pocket is great description.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. As difficult as this is to read, it must be more so for you and family to face every day. I wish I could send you strength and a strong heart, but life just doesn’t work that way. I will keep you in my thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I can only imagine how many challenges you’ve been through and I know anything went easy. So sorry for your loss. -All kind of difficult moments should be sharing in many ways in order to keep our self together and see clearly our future. There is always a good thing in a negative situation, because after all as a human being we are a good person and we know how to love and take care of others.- I’m sure you did your best for your family!

    Liked by 1 person

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