Waiting…

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Waiting to Die 

Becoming obsolete is one of life’s most difficult burdens

It is not something that comes on quickly

But rather happens over a few years

When things once held dear are no longer valued by the next generation

It raises a turmoil of the soul that at first kicks and screams

But gradually subsides into a churning rumble

Only to be followed by a great dull ache

Becoming physically challenged only adds to the burden

Our bodies slow down // wear out // won’t co-operate // get repaired

Bounce back at times // only to slowly head back down the slippery slope of time

That waits for no one // but seems to careen wildly toward the cliff

This too raises the turmoil of the soul //that at first kicks and screams

But gradually subsides into that churning rumble

Only to be followed by a great dull ache// and a swell of physical pain

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Becoming physically and/or mentally disabled increases the burden even more

When one can no longer care for himself

Or has the strength to move about

Losing the memory to recall life’s joys and sorrows

Or that unwanted friend and companion, arthritis, moves in and out

One begins to wonder why he continues to go on living

Now it’s just a long dull ache // for the inner kicking and screaming now subsides

Becoming totally dependent //sometimes unable to speak or function

Is probably the biggest burden of all.

Long hours of little change of position or surroundings 

Struggling for life with each difficult breath

Simply sitting or lying, waiting day after day

For the edge of the cliff to appear

Must make one wonder why some leave this world like the drop of a hat

While others continue on and on simply waiting to die

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But what of heaven and the future life to come

Surely that should make it all better

Surely that should ease the pain of separation and loss

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When all you know is the life you are living // and the pain you are feeling

It is difficult to focus on what will come

In the present suffering one may understand what lies in store

But only feels the last pains of separation

From this earthly body into an immortal one

Safe in the arms of God

 

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Photos of Mother’s Flowers: Dwight L. Roth

My mother-in-law loved raising flowers. She had a green thumb as you can see. She died of a brain tumor in 2013. I wrote this poem while we were waiting at the end.

Today is open link night at d’Verse. Come join us and post a poem of your own choice.

https://dversepoets.com/

 

 

44 thoughts on “Waiting…

  1. A poem, perhaps, only a former hospice chaplain/grief coordinator can read and enjoy for what it is. It is too hard… or too real… for too many. Sadly. I come from a tribe that celebrates a life passing into the next as a part of living. We walk together.

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    • Yes, we too celebrate the passing from this life to the next. But, the emotion and reality of that time was very difficult. Seeing others got through this makes one take note of his own life as he is aging as well. Thank you for your thoughts.

      Liked by 2 people

      • There is always the emotion and reality … it is from that pain that you formed this wonderful poetic memorial. And, yes, we all face the forward trail, more aware as we approach its terminus. Have your transfer in hand and look forward to having “a ticket to ride.”

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  2. Aging gracefully is a beautiful stage of life! We ALL have to get old! But bless God for life always! If he hadn’t sent Jesus to die for us we wouldn’t have everlasting life after this life concludes! Sorry about your loss and one day you both will be reconciled when Jesus comes again. This is our hope! 😇 God bless you and thanks for sharing! Much love! Xxoo 💓

    Liked by 1 person

  3. The dull ache. Not only I can see this as I care for elderly, but in watching our society give up the values, the morals, perhaps at a much greater speed than ever before. This poem says so much. What a great awakening heaven will be. All our earthly senses that just get in the way have to be completely dead. Death before life! I love the flowers!

    Liked by 1 person

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